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Elephant jokes #74

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What did the baby elephant get when the daddy elephant sneezed ?

Out of the way !

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Elephant jokes #73

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What’s big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland ?

The Loch Ness Elephant !

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Elephant jokes #72

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What did the hotel manager say to the elephant that couldn’t pay his bill ? “Pack your trunk and clear out !”

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Elephant jokes #71

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How do you hire an elephant ?

Stand it on four bricks !

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Elephant jokes #70

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When should you feed milk to a baby elephant ?

When it’s a baby elephant !

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Elephant jokes #69

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What’s the difference between an elephant and a gooseberry ?

A gooseberry is green !

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Elephant jokes #68

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Why did the elephant jump in the lake when it began to rain ?

To stop getting wet !

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Elephant jokes #67

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What do elephants do in the evenings ?

Watch elevision !

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Elephant jokes #66

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What grey, has a wand, huge wings and gives money to elephants ?

The tusk fairy !

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Elephant jokes #65

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Why is an elephant braver than a hen ?

Because the elephant isn’t chicken !

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Elephant jokes #64

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What does a bald elephant wear for a toupee?

A sheep.

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Elephant jokes #63

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Why don’t elephants like playing cards in the jungle ?

Because of all the cheetahs !

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Elephant jokes #62

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How do you stop an angry elephant from charging ?

Take away it’s credit cards !

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Elephant jokes #61

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming ?

Here come the elephants

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Elephant jokes #60

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Why do elephants prefer peanuts to caviar?

Because they’re easier to get at the ballpark.

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Elephant jokes #59

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How to you tell the difference between an elephant and a mouse ?

Try picking them up !

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Elephant jokes #58

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It was a boring Sunday afternoon in the jungle so the Elephants decided to challenge the Ants to a game of soccer. The game was going well with the Elephants beating the Ants ten goals to nil, when the Ants gained possession. The Ants’ star player was dribbling the ball towards the Elephants’ goal when the Elephants’ left back came lumbering towards him.

The elephant trod on the little ant, killing him instantly. The referee stopped the game. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? Do you call that sportsmanship, killing another player?”

The elephant replied, “Well, I didn’t mean to kill him — I was just trying to trip him up.”

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Elephant jokes #57

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What kind of elephants live in Antartica ?

Cold ones !

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Elephant jokes #56

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How do you make an elephant sandwich?

First of all, you get a very large loaf…

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Elephant jokes #55

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Bill:”My homework is really difficult tonight, I’ve to write an essay on an elephant.”?

Bert:”Well, for a start your going to need a big ladder..”

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Elephant jokes #54

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An elephant was walking in a park. With each step he took, he squished many little ants. Upset, the ants began to crawl up on the elephant — first his legs and then up all over his body. When the elephant started feeling all the little ants on him, he shook hard, making all the little ants, except for one, fall to the ground. As the only ant on the elephant hung on close to the elephant’s neck, the ones on the ground began to yell, “Strangle him!!! Strangle him!!!”

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