What was King Arthur’s favourite game ?

Knights and crosses !

Why did the Romans build straight roads ?

So their soldiers didn’t go around the bend !

What was the greatest accomplishment of the early Romans ?

Speaking Latin !

If Atlas supported the world on his shoulders, who supported Atlas ?

His wife !

What famous chiropodist ruled England ?

William the Corn-cutter!

Q: Where does Napolean keep his armies?

A: In his sleevies!

Why does history keep repeating itself ?

Because we weren’t listening the first time !

Why did Henry VIII have so many wives ?

He liked to chop and change !

Where was the Magna Carta signed ?

At the bottom !

What did General Patton do on Thanksgiving?

He gave tanks.

Why did the Pilgrims create Thanksgiving?

They wanted another excuse to watch football.

What did Caesar say to Cleopatra ?

Toga-ether we can rule the world !

When were King Arthur’s army too tired to fight ?

When they had lots of sleepless knights !

Where did the pilgrims land when they came to America ?

On their feet !

The Spanish explorers went round the world in a galleon.

How many galleons did the get to the mile !

Who gave the Liberty Bell to Philadelphia?

Must have been a duck family

A duck family?

Didn’t you say there was a quack in it !

Whose son was Edward, the Black Prince?

Old King Coal !

What English King invented the fireplace ?

Alfred the grate !

Why did the pioneers cross the country in covered wagons ?

Because they didn’t want to wait 40 years for a train !

“You know an ancestor of mine came over on the Mayflower.”

“Really? Which rat was he?”

What was Camelot ?

A place where people parked their camels !

What did Paul Revere say when he got on his horse?

Giddy up horsey !

Why did Arthur have a round table ?

So no one could corner him !

What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common ?

They both have ‘the’ as their middle names !

What did the Pharaohs use to keep their babies quiet?

Egyptian dummies.