Why are chorus girls like barge horses?

They have to tow the line!

Where did the Knights of the Round Table park their horses?

In the Sir Lance Lot

Why was the man sued by his horse?

For palomino-money!

Did you hear about the man who received a tip on a horse called Cigarette?

He didn’t have enough money tabaccer!

What did the horse say to whinnie the pooh while watching his t.v. show?

I wish I could hear you whinnie.

Why was the racehorse names Strawberry Ice?

He was a sherbet!

What equine likes to cut in line?

A sawhorse!

You said this horse could jump as high as a ten foot fence and he can’t jump at all.

Well neither can a fence!

What happened to Lady Godiva’s horse when he saw she had no clothes on?

It made him shy!

How do you go about hiring a horse?

Try two pairs of stilts!

How do you hire a horse?

Put a brick under each hoof!

Did you hear about the horse that has made a dozen films?

He’s not a star though, he just does bit parts!

What’s another name for an assistant stable cleaner?

A co-pile-it!

What is the strongest animal?

A racehorse, because it can take hundreds of people for a ride at once!

What couple rode a horse up a hill to fetch a pail of water?

Jockey and Jill!

Why is horse racing so romantic?

Because the horse hugs the rails, the jockey puts his arms around the horse and you can kiss your money goodbye!

Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses?

He was a rough rider!

Why did the boy stand behind the horse?

He thought he might get a kick out of it!

What’s black and white and turns cartwheels?

A piebald horse pulling a cart!

Why is an egg like a young horse?

Because it can’t be used until it’s broken!

Why did the bareback performer ride his horse?

Because it got too heavy to carry.

How do you make a small fortune out of horses?

Start off with a large fortune!

What is a horses favourite kind of party?

A stall ball.

Did you hear about the man who ate nothing but oats every day?

He fell in love with the Grand National winner!

A man has a racehorse, never won a race. Man in disgust says,” Horse, you win today or you pull a milk wagon tomorrow morning.” The starting gate opens, the horses take-off, they move the gate away and there lays his horse asleep on the track. He kicks the horse and asks, “WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING.” The horse, half asleep says, “I have to get up at three in the morning.”